Onion Peels
Wondering what if’s, drowning in lost ambitions, lacking a sense of reality-focused judgment, looming hopelessly over lost desires or tired of the same ole’? Have we lost ourselves? Is this the end? Is this it? It’s like you grow so much, so quickly emotionally, inside, intrinsically. It feels so wonderful, but when it stops, or consciously stops its like……….”Wait, where is my respirator? (frantically searching for that fall-back of security, knowing you’re growing from that given experience) It must be unplugged…
Maybe in these periods we grow the most. Maybe when we’re in the most confused state and feel dumb, its the complete opposite…
Things are going well for the most part, compared to 8 months ago you tell yourself, but it doesn’t quite feel like it..Cause’ maybe something is missing, yes that’s it.
When you are content – in a sense you are lost. You get into routines because its easy. Things just kind of flow with the natural progression of life…
But contentment can come with a price of a lack of seeing through the fine lines of communication, of everyday situations, of whats really under it all (seems like a high social IQ, comes with a lot of fake gestures) oh my!
Once your in the merrry-go-round(the alteration of your natural persona to a more societal acceptable way) it’s hard to escape. Its almost a trap. You either jump in and become a working part of society, or stay out and become an outsider who is shunned for all eternity… Definitely an exaggeration, but the point is that the key is to really stick to your gut feeling. Sometimes your gut feeling is covered up by another gut feeling. The more you grow the more layers you have to peel back to know yourself.
Maybe, pro-longed confusion is your body, mind, and soul telling you to re-evaluate yourself, look deeper than what seems to be, or what most would say, what is. What is may be completely different, only YOU can really see the scope of what your missing inside.. Confide in yourself, its alright sometimes.
