As I was getting ready to leave the cool of the freon this morning, I finally came up with a solution to a current problem I was having, and it all has to do with my attitude. My attitude in general is usually pretty optimistic, but I do get flare ups on occasion,  and something like an ex-wife or taxes can really become something that consumes too much space in the old noggin. I realized that by looking at the issue of paying tax in the U.S. in a completely grateful frame of mind, one quickly sees that it’s obviously for our own good. Slaves used to pick cotton for the plantation owner, now the plantation owner is the Federal Reserve and they have got the residents of this land in the slavery of debt. I say, “Thank You,” to the Fed for making me realize that I need debt, discipline, and punishment, not the ability and desire to learn how to take care of my own self, grow my own food without pesticides or genetic manipulation. Why can’t we have whole communities of self-sufficient, cost-effective, hurricane proof housing built that has a water reclamation system that produces better rated, better quality water than the city, grows it’s own food, AND produces ethanol gas?  Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you Zenlofts, the Art of Green Construction and Sustainability.

Today began, as usual, with me waking up with a raging stiff one, but I feel that it’s always better to lay perfectly still until it goes away, as these kind of things can quickly get out of hand and also requires cleanup afterwards. Yet, I was finding  it was difficult not to think about the hot Jewish girl I exchanged email info with yesterday at the Hadgi-Mart.  I passed her on the way in, noticed how fucking hot she was, and watched her walk away. After I had finished my transaction of trading two dollars and seventy-eight cents of worthless U.S. currency for two packs of strawberry flavored [filtered] cigars, she came and stood right next to me at the counter. She had to go dig in her car for change because the Hadgi-mart is over-priced. I threw 30 cents on the counter for her cause Daddy wanted baby-girl to have that Hershey bar, and she started to tell me about how she just moved here from Ft. Myers, hasn’t had any luck meeting people, and was just in a car accident that had her at the hospital getting a couple of stitches, and all she wanted was chocolate and home. I told her I was looking for a dancer, nothing nude, but the style is provocative and sexy-similar to lap dancing. She said she was  interested, and gave me her email address. I actually need two female dancers, but finding one that I have good chemistry with is a step in the right direction.  I have to make a submission tape of a minute and thirty seconds of completed choreography by the 18th to be selected for a spot in the showcase.  Y’all ain’t never seen no moves like the ones I’m throwing down. I guess I have to build my own scene down here, cause I’m just not down with this one.

When the need is in the mind,  you cannot satisfy the need.  When the need is in the mind, the whole judgement, the whole knowledge, is also there.  This makes sex so difficult to deal with.  The mind doesn’t need sex.  What the mind really needs is love, not sex.

Damn, homegirl has got the cutest feet… I thought as she stood before me, looking like the goddess I knew she was.

It was this woman standing in front of me that had me rearranging my schedule on an hourly basis, and that sometimes meant that I had to sacrifice plans that I had made even months in advance. Everything else could go fuck itself in comparison to me getting to spend any part of my day with her. I could only imagine how elated my days would be if I could wake up and see her every day. A woman like this is so rare in my world that she got me to come back to this neighborhood after living abroad in Tampa for a few months, and she was the entire reason that I might stick around for the rest of my existence on this dump of a planet. I can hitch a ride on any passing UFO and be up out this bitch in an instant, sailing back to the god-forsaken, frozen planet of Minnesota. Guns Blazin’.  Easy and Dre yelling “Fuck the police!” from the most wicked of all extraterrestrial sound systems. But, this shit’s different. I’ll stick around for as long as she lets me. When it comes to spending time with her I have the greatest sense of being in the right place at the right time. She’s the exact opposite of an addiction… she’s a goddess.

Could you make a vinegar and water and give it to the douche-bag at the end of the bar, please?

“Why do you always let that sorry-ass nigga run on you all the time?” I asked.

She always said that she was living her life to the fullest. True, she was among the living, but we all knew that it wasn’t really much of a life. One 15 minute conversation with her and perception would tell you that she’d had her spirit broken almost to the point of death. Trusting someone new would be a challenge for her. Every time the door closed we would all wonder if this would be the night that he would cross the line. What’s next? Bruises or a body bag? I want to show her what living life is really about, but she’s already living life to the fullest.

So, my friend tells me today that the older brother of someone that she went to school with contacted her on Facebook a while back, and this guy is total Bible thumper. He added her as a friend saying, “You might remember me from high school. I was a couple years ahead of you, and you were friends with my brother.” Blah blah blah. Well, she had pity on him, and confirmed the request. Now, you need to understand that everything on this guys profile was about Jesus, the Bible, or some other Christian rhetoric. Then, one day, he says something to her on Facebook about sending her a text message, and she says, “That’s fine,” as she has her number listed on Facebook, and she thought that maybe he would send something inspirational or whatever. What she receives is a picture of his penis. Needless to say, she dropped him as a friend, and then received emails from him asking if that was inappropriate. Ya think?



I’m not quite sure what the fuck I was doing in Ybor City on a Sunday night, let alone the Sunday night that Kool Keith was performing at the Czar. As much as I can recall, a friend of mine who was having relationship problems came to me and asked me if he could stash his lunchbox in my car stating up front that it had his weed in it. I finished up what I was working on, and then went to a house party where I drank copious amounts of beer, and then to my sister’s place way the fuck on the other side of town, forgetting that my friend had stashed his box in my car. Upon finding it whilst rooting through my car, I opened it up to see exactly what was in it, and much to my surprise found a couple of felonies in said box. The contents it held was a couple of ounces of really expensive kind bud, all bagged up in sixty-dollar increments. So, with that said, I’m glad I’m not currently sitting in a federal prison right now sharpening my toothbrush on the concrete floor.

The only reason that I was in Ybor on a Sunday was because I was returning the box to my friend. After he retrieved the box back from my G-Ride, I went to one of my favorite Ybor establishments, and was just in there killing Continue reading

During a dream, a man sees his reflection in a mirror. It is not him. The reflection mimics every move. But it is not him. He looks again. The same image remains. He is startled enough to wake.

Slightly longer than a month earlier and 2000 miles away, that same man wakes, ALMOST. A strange and bewildering feeling of void is felt. A millisecond of this feeling is too much. Zero ability to grasp any reality, no bearing, no apparent matter. Griping his mind the man yanks the surrounding into reality, reeling from lapse of reason.

Strangeness the man has not felt before prevails but a sense of peace and confidence still resides.

The man notices that this “strangeness” is weaving through his species.

It is an uncomfortable phenomenon and the man wants no part of it. Remain separate from the manic. Not sucked in.

Yes it is possible, challenging but possible.

Worry, never worry the man states. Is this apathy? Is it recognizing the futility? Is it looked at as weakness?

Knowing the correct course helps to stem worry. There will be waves to buffet the vessel but vision ahead calms nerves.

All psychobabble most likely. All a wonderment most definitely.

Eric